One of the gifts...

One of the gifts I feel like I've gotten from this process is not to take things personally. Today Fi was being cranky and demanding about precisely what she wanted, and she chose to step out of the room. I went to check on her, and sat with her for a bit then told her I loved her (for no particular reason), and she told me she loved me back. i stepped away, and in a little while she came back in and joined us and was able to accept the offer we'd given her (strawberry jelly on her homemade croissant (!!) rather than licked off the knife). I so admire that both she and I can say that to each other when we're at odds with each other, and from an honest place - she felt so mature at that moment. The moment's disagreement and the fact that we cared for each other were separate issues.

Now to decide what boundaries I want to set about her staying with me when we're shopping or out on a walk/hike... She can be really good, agreeing to go with me on a hike to visit my friends (not her favorite thing), then going back the way we just came (!!) to see if other friends ad arrived, when all along she really wanted to go play in the water on this 90 degree day. After those probably interminable 20-30 minutes, she was no longer willing to follow down the grassy path when the sandy path looked so much faster...and we ended up following her (she was fast!). It was a reasonable choice for her, though the grassy path is a better choice for me 'cause I can let our reactive/unpredictable poodle wander off leash more safely on the latter. In retrospect, she had been really patient, and it seems a reasonable choice both for her to ask for and for us to agree with. Along the way to my favorite water access (not too steep/dangerous), there were several points of access to the water (steep and/or dangerous!) that Fi recognized and requested to follow - when I told her no, all times she reluctantly agreed. And then, we got to the GREAT water access and had a fabulous time. Hurrah! In retrospect, she was incredibly reasonable, and I'm grateful not only for that but for this chance to recognize it in review.

hope all are well out there.